It is that time of the year again when I am riddled with doubt. Self doubt, non-self doubt, half-doubt, other-half doubt, just all kinds of doubt. Just questions that you need to know the answer to at this point in life. And by this point, I mean the post-college, figuring out my life and career, making sure I am considering all available (and non available) options stage of life. I start being 24 in a few days, and it scares me. Not that bitching about it on my blog is going to help, but writing things out is always a nice thing to do. I remember the annoyance I felt when I was writing this post. It is always annoying when people who matter in your life tell you that you need to know these answers right now, however supportive they try to sound while they do.
But this much is true- I know a lot more than I did a year ago(this is also probably because I did not know much to begin with, either way-). Not only with respect to education/career, relationships, equations, but also just about myself and possible things I enjoy/dislike. But again, the more you learn the more you fail to understand. But it is fun to begin to grasp. Maybe some day.
Anyway. This is a great song, we all love Florence and the Machine and it’s also the summer filled with swimming, so this song is quite literally very pertinent, and it also seems to totally go with the general theme of life as I lead it today and this week.
Whenever I am stressed, my nightmares involve me swimming against floods, that start as blizzards and melt into mounds of water flooding my space. Clearly I deal with stress very well. But any way. Did not know why that was important to share. But until next time,
I was sinking, but now I’m sunk
And I was drinking, and now I’m drunk
Your songs remind me of swimming
But somehow I forgot.